If you know anything about astrology, you’ll know that Mercury in retrograde is a bad thing. Particularly for anything that has a plug and requires an electrical outlet. Case in point:

1. I cracked the screen of a brand spankin’ new netbook**
2. My laptop died**

**These two events happened months ago, so technically it’s not part of this Mercury episode, but I bring it up for a reason.

Okay, so during this particular Mercury retrograde (known as MR for brevity in all future mentions) phase:

3. My desktop died
4. My washing machine died (at the tender age of 7!)

Now, here’s where Mercury gets tricky. Technically, you not only hafta watch your already owned electrical items during MR, but you’re also warned against buying *new* electrical items during MR. Umm…it’s Christmas time? And I can’t be without a desktop and a washing machine until mid-January when MR ends.

What’s a girl to do? No, really. What would you do? I welcome all suggestions that do not involve sharp items, bloodshed, or the ingestion of mind-altering products. Give me something good, and I’ll send you a prize!